story at night

have felt this feeling?
i oftenly feel it.
you know,
sometimes,
i feel like
i lose myself,
i lose my passion,
my intention, my hope

it feels like
some kind of lonliness
i feel like
im all alone in this world

i have U, God
but,
i dont have someone called 'bestfriend' like the others
maybe it's just my opinion
maybe, i've just desprate
or,
maybe im feeling 'galau'
and that's the reason why i feel like that
or maybe'
im not open my heart widely,
im not opem my eyes and see clearly
or maybe im not open my ears and listen carefully
i become very selfish,
i dont care too much
maybe that's the reason
i dont know

here,
i dont want blame anyone or myself.
i just want to share what i feel,
maybe
it will be useful someday.

or maybe,
i just write this because i cant sleep
and maybe after writing,
i can sleep well.
you know,
i dont know why,
but i just feel not good,